Recently I’ve been reading a few articles about guys being absolutely baffled by the things their dates have done. Obviously they did not fuck their dates, otherwise they wouldn’t have been posting about these experiences.
One of these experiences involved a Tinder date coming straight over to the guy’s house for ‘drinks and movies’, only to spend more time petting his dog and not wanting to put out, but not wanting to leave.
Another involved her driving from another city just to go see him, then giving him the cold shoulder inside his apartment, and telling him how weird it is to be inside a stranger’s apartment.
Now I could profess to be an expert at ‘turning women around’ to ‘never have ASD/LMR again’, but that’s PUA hype/phony sales tactics. We can never control the randomness of a woman’s actions.
A typical guy would respond in the following ways, when a situation like this occurs:
- Kick her out, and possibly get mad at her during the process
- Keep trying for hours and hours, then finally get through
- Keep trying for hours and hours, get nowhere, but still be a gentleman, then only to have her give you radio silence when you contact her, then get mad and let it eat you up
This happened to me a lot, and still does, and I used to get extremely mad when dealing with this sort of thing, it’d then eat me up inside, I’d go rant to my friends, and probably get insomnia for that night just thinking about it.
Obviously my reaction was not healthy, and it’s a vicious cycle that wore me out. I had to come up with a better way to deal with a commonly occurring scenario. Particularly when one embarks on a mission of sleeping with many women.
The method I found to be most effective at dealing with this involves a few key elements:
Element 1 – understanding what type of social stigmas are working against you
This isn’t a biggie, but I thought I’d put it in for those of you who like dating women with hard core social programming. E.g. Russians/Filipinos/Non-Westernized Asians, etc…
Typically, you’re looking at 5+ dates + lots of other bullshit with these girls, so knowing this before you go in, really helps – especially when it comes to not flipping your shit.
Element 2 – understanding that women have absolutely 0 logic or capacity to think rationally
Woah! Big Call!
I know right?
Now I’m not going to give you a PHD thesis, spanning 100 pages on why I believe this to be true. From my experience however, I’ve found this to be absolutely true. It’s also helped me set my mind at ease and not care about trying to decipher women. It’s also one of very few times I agree with conventional wisdom, particularly ‘men are from Mars and women are from Venus’.
Don’t believe me? Let me give you some examples:
Example 1 – this girl I took home on the same day, who had a boyfriend (in another country).
We spent over 8 hours in my bed, repeating a process of panties on/panties off, panties on/panties off.
Eventually I gave up on taking her panties off, push them to one side, and licked her pussy. She came within about 30 seconds. Thinking this was a sure shot lay, I go for a condom and go up to kiss her, while trying to do her missionary. She refused to kiss me because ‘kissing you is cheating, and it also means I like you’. She also refused to let me in, because that’s cheating. But getting licked and cumming is not, apparently.
She then told me we can never talk again, and I dropped her home.
5 days later, we caught up. She still refused to kiss me. We go through the same ritual of panties on/panties off, panties on/panties off. She tells me again we should cut contact.
I see her the next day. She tells me she’s dumped her bf. We kiss and we fuck, then we go on to date for about 6 months. Where’s the logic in that?
Example 2 – this girl I took home from a nightclub. I never go clubbing anymore, because it really puts me off how trashy the girls are.
Anyhow, I approach her, we talk a bit, and I take her by the hand out of the club. We walk to my house and I get her into my room. She wouldn’t kiss me, so I just go for her boobs and pussy. She doesn’t resist.
I then take her panties off and lift her dress up. She doesn’t resist.
I then put on a condom and we bang. She’s loving it, but still wouldn’t kiss me.
2 minutes later, she pushes me off and says ‘no more’. I was like WTF?!?
She tells me that men are all pigs who use women, so she wanted to give me taste of our own medicine. Where’s the logic in that?
Needless to say I kicked her out, then went full tilt.
Example 3 – this was a virgin who I took home before I went to Europe. No matter what I did, she refused to put out, and we only got as far as 2nd base.
I then leave for around 5 months to Europe. We kept in contact a little bit, because she thought I made her pregnant? Anyhow, it was a false alarm.
After not having seen each other for 5+ months, I return to Auckland, and the first night we catch up, we fuck. It was the full on kinky kind too, with ropes and all.
Where’s the logic in that?
Element 3 – mitigate your single point of failure
This element is by far the most important one, and I talk about it more on my ‘how to have a first date’ article.
In TL/DR terms, you need 300% coverage for all of your dates. So for example, if you’re going on a date with a girl at 5pm, you’d better be booking one for 6pm, 7pm, and 8pm.
If 5pm goes well, you can always cancel on 6pm. But if 5pm isn’t putting out by 6:30pm, you can always kick 5pm out and go see 7pm. And so on….
Sounds cruel, but hey, that’s how the world works. Don’t believe me?
Example – I recently bumped into a girl who flaked on me. She was surprisingly friendly. I ended up asking her what happened.
She told me that she liked me, but she knew I was a fuck boy, especially because I was so confident and dominant with my touching, and how we were cuddling within 30 minutes of the first date starting.
She also said that she had 2 other dates that week. One guy was completely boring, but the other was on the acceptable side of nice guy. He ended up taking her out on 3 dates (and paying for all of them), and now they’re monogamous bf/gf.
Guys. Hopefully, after reading this article, you can rest a bit easier if your dates don’t work out. Just remember, when it comes to ANYTHING in life, you’ll always lose more than you win. The winners are just the ones who keep calm and carry on.
Being a player is a grind. Much like making gains at the gym, learning how to do skill work (like muscle-ups/handstands), and any other skill that has ups/downs, so is picking up girls.
The ones who do best at this whole ‘game’ thing, are the ones who repeat a tried/tested process, ignore the anomalies, understand that weird shit happens, and understand that there is no possible way to understand females, thus just rolls with the punches.
Keep calm and carry on gentlemen.